Rabbit Hole of Doom

Hi, my names William and I’m a YouTube and Stack Overflow taught programmer. I took 2 years of coding in vb.net while attending Highschool. I graduated in 2019! WOOT! WOOT! I feel I understand the basic concepts of coding Classes and Variable Manipulation. I walked out of Highschool with my head high and determined to make the best programmer of myself. Now this is my issue at hand. I’ve always wanted to make a difference in the world no matter how big or what I had to do to get there. The moment I scripted my first" Hello World!" app I knew this was my calling. I don’t understand what I’m suppose to learn to have this opportunity. I’ve seen numerous of ways I could approach making the world easier and better.(apps, automations, etc) I’ve coded several applications in different languages and feel I have a great grasp of not only how to code but the way it should be done. Great! Just kidding! I got on Triplebyte and was clueless to almost every test I took. It was asking questions about some things that I never even heard of. Just about every line of code on here I can read and rewrite but there’s still so much I don’t understand. I’ve tried to make a list of every word that I don’t understand but each word turns into thirty more. Lmao I’ve learned multiple different languages just to find out I still don’t get it. But c’mon I’m 20 years old and skipped every Highschool party I didn’t hang out with people outside of school. Instead I was cooped up in a room trying to find out how to import graphical libraries manually into C++.(I did and it turned out like crap lol) Basically what I’m trying to say is I freaking LOVE programming everything about it just makes me happy.(Well that’s kind of a lie lol) I want use my knowledge, love and passion of coding to do more then make games or applications. I’m always looking to learn more but I can’t afford college and never have time to do what I love. I wish I had a job in this field and I makes me sad to feel pushed out by the only thing that makes me feel valued. Other then programming I’m just a dude.